External Guest Critique

Guest: Stuart Godwin - creative director from Cheil

There are some things that I should take note in my artefact.

1. Social Media

In the landing page, there should be a link that directs to a page that describes and shows the progress of my FYP. It could be a written link or a clickable link.

2. Kids are smarter than we think they are

The interaction is not necessary to be very simple, it can be slightly complicated as kids are not as stupid as we think. Kids loves to explore new things, they will click and see anything they saw that is moving or interesting.

3. Adding more sounds and animations

Kids love hearing sounds. If they click something, it gives feedback like sound and animation, this will encourage them to continue clicking . It will indirectly guide them to click.

4. Slight gruesome plot twist that surprise the kids.

It is nice to see there is a plot twist at the end that shows a surprising ending which will makes the kid excited to see something unexpected.

Instructions

In my artefact, to allow the user to learn how to navigate, I have added some simple instructions to allow them to learn where to click and interact.

As Machinarium is my artstyle benchmark, I use a similar approach like it to guide the user how to play.

This is a scene in Machinarium. It shows an indication of how to interact.

And this is my artefact, using dotted lines that guides the user and show them where to start.

Underwater scenes 2

Initially, I painted this scene in psd and wanted to use it as the tea party scene where Alice meets the mad hatter, but i changed as it I found a better solution.

Then i changed the scene which has a similar colour palette with Alice in Wonderland. This is a forest-like scene and added some coral plants and bubbles to make it looks like it is underwater.

 Using this scene as a reference, I created my scene's colour palette with a similar look to it. 

These are some screen shot of the digitized scenes.

Underwater scene Refined

These are some scenes that I refined. Compared to the previous dark dull and boring scene, I made this scene more lively and vibrant as kids loves colourful things. There will be swimming fishes in the background and some floating animated seaweed.  

This scene will allow user to click on the cave entrance which will be blinking as a guide to get their attention to click on it.

Mermaid Identity.

While I am designing the mermaid, I feel that it looks odd and similar to other mermaid design. I was trying to add and change some features of it and did some research on how should I make it looks special.

As I consult my specialist tutor, he told me that people had the shape and the idea of how 'mermaid' looks like, half body and half tail. It is not necessary to change it as it may not be a mermaid anymore but some creature with a given name mermaid.

Therefore, I decided to stick with this design and not making it looks 'fancy'.

Title Design

For the title of this interactive narrative artefact. I made a few choices and in the end thinks that 'Journey of the Sea' will be the title. As the story is a journey and exploration of the underwater world, I think that the title will bring a brief idea to the audience that they will see a sight or a story that is related to the sea and ocean.

I tried to sketching the title and wanted to put in the scene while the user can straight away click and play with it. But without a title page, I think that it does not looks complete. Therefore i choose to make a landing page.

After some try and error of title design, I came out with the final look of it.

I blend in the title to the sand as it looks like written on it. I also added some waves as nobody touches or interacting with it so it will not looks static and user doesn't realise that is it playable.

Coding - Test

** scene one **

While I start coding, I draw the image in flash and make the animation all within flash. While everything works, I export all required media from psd to flash and make the actual coding.

While I am scripting the artefact, there are many bugs that makes to animation not working. I found solutions by the help and guidance of my specialist tutorial.

Scenes and progress

I had made a few differences as Im creating the scene where the mermaid and the girl meets. In the picture below, it shows that I first created the scene where it can only see the back or the girl and the mermaid. This is not a good perspective as the user cannot see the expression of the character clearly. So I changed again but this time it broke the 180 degree rules that make the scene looks disconnected to the previous one. In the previous scene, the mermaid is shown to be at the right but current scene it switched places with the girl. This will make the user feels confusing as the placement is not placed correctly. 

Then, I digitized the scene in a different way. As seen in the picture below, the placement is now better and relates to the previous scene. In addition, I use speech bubble to make the character chat but not voice over as picture can tells a million words and it is intenationally understood, there will not be any language barrier to understand the narrative.

I may implement to create some comic panels to show what is the character trying to show in the scene. But my initiative is to allow the user to just understand and see the interaction in a big scene. So I will just put this aside first and while I am doing user testing, I would find the best solution to narrate the story.

These are some digitized sketch of the scenes underwater. I will further refine as it looks very rough and the colour looks dull and dark.

interaction design

I start designing the interaction design by making notes and using key element to pin point the main interaction. As this is designed for kids to interact, I try to make the interaction simple and direct as the main focus is the narrative.

I've drawn an overall scene and where the interaction is added to. I also made some notes to detail out the things that I need to create.

Scene 1

I first started doing the first scene which is the scene at the beach where the little girl meets the mermaid while she is playing at the seaside. 

I did some sketches to find the best position to put the character in place.

I made a digitized outline to test and draw the walkcycle and character movements.

A overall look of the first scene. I sketched the outline first before adding colour to it.

This is the final look of the scene. I am testing and trying to add more things in the scenes as the user can find some interesting hidden clickable items.

storyboard

While I am doing the digitizing, I have my story sketched in frames so that when I refer and make changes as I am use it as a reference. 

Making a storyboard that shows the full story of my animation makes it easier for me as I want to refine my story and adding in interactions.

I draw a linear story plot to pinpoint the important event in the story, while using Alice in Wonderland's plotline as a guidance. When I do so, I also think of ways to add in elements that is related to Alice in Wonderland, for example, adding the tea party scene in to the story or using a similar character that mimic the behaviour of the cheshire cat.  

Character Designing

 As I am doing the chacterer design, I list out the important character that appears in Alice in Wonderland scene. 

The existance of all characters in my narrative plot are made for a special reason. Some important object is also used in the plot and is an important factor that make the story lively.

1. Alice as Alice

She is still the main character, same name as the girl in Alice in Wonderland. In my story, she had a dream in the underwater world while she was coma.

2. Rabbit who runs down the hole as a Mermaid

The Rabbit who leads Alice to the Wonderland is now a Mermaid. But, the different thing is that the mermaid is by the main character side, unlike the rabbit which makes Alice finds it at the start. The mermaid only disappear half way while the bad guy captured her.

3. Twins is now the villain

As we know from Alice in Wonderland, the twins acted as the annoying ones who tries to stop Alice from progressing, blocking her way. So in my story, I added a touch of similarity to the Little Mermaid story. Ursula's eels are trying to destroy and make things fails between the prince and the mermaid. Therefore, I make the twins the 'obstacle' that captures the Mermaid and brings her to the queen. It is actually because that the Mermaid has a necklace that possesses power.

4. Mad Hatter is still having his tea party

Now, Mad Hatter is a sea creature that gives a hint to Alice to show her the direction towards the queen's castle. 

5. Cheshire cat as a Whale

The similarity of this 2 character is it leads the way to the queen's castle. The Cat opens a 'portal' and directly show her the way to the castle. While in my plot, the whale is a transport that will direct Alice to the castle.

6. Queen of hearts as usual, loves red even she is underwater.

The villain, Queens of hearts plays the antagonist role has a flare towards red and love shapes, her castle are filled with red things.

And lastly, there will be a necklace that will affect a few scenes in the storyline.

These are some sketches done while I am testing on my sketch book.

this are the digitized copy of my characters

About

This is a study blog about the process of my final year project. I am creating an interactive narrative artefact which is mainly focusing on the story and has a passive interaction. I would like to explore storytelling and this is a way that I express my imagination.

This is a reimagined story of Alice in Wonderland and partially from the Little Mermaid. The narrative is contains my own narrative elements. By using the story of Alice in Wonderland, it gives a touch of unique selling point to gain the audiences attention. This is also a guide to the user to know the 'hint' of the interaction if they had watch the animation before. 

The story contains a plot twist in the end which allows the user to know that the whole journey is just a dream. The little girl Alice was experiencing coma and she dreamed herself meeting a mermaid friend and get a chance to explore the unique underwater world.